In Which A. gets to school on time
Nov. 10th, 2025 01:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
walkitoutSo, yeah, no fever and felt like going. I screwed up and put a pot of beans on the stove to cook (soaked all day yesterday and last night) then went upstairs with my breakfast rather than sending A.’s food up (misophonia requires her to not listen to people chewing). A. eventually came out of the bathroom to see the beans boiling over. I kind of lost my shit, because I would never have walked away from them except I keep trying to making things work better in the morning, and unfortunately the normal routine is actually as good as it can be made to be and all efforts lead to some kind of problem (previous problem involved me falling partway down the stairs and ripping a bunch of skin off my forearm where I was gripping the banister and then swung out over the newel at the end which gouged me pretty good — no blood tho, just a lot of bruising and bits of skin to pick off).
As is pretty typical of my frustration / autism driven meltdowns, I don’t stop engaging in problem solving. I accelerate. So new plan is: no phone after midnight. I think that staring at the screen results in her staying up really late, especially if she is not sleep deprived. Saturday she slept past noon, catching up on the week’s sleep debt (necessary!) but then she didn’t go to sleep until 3:30 or later on Sunday morning. By Monday, she was probably slightly short but not much — but effectively 2+ hours jetlagged. Really stupid shit. I’ve asked her to read some of the science on the phone light / circadian rhythm / inconsistent waking and going to bed times etc. and how harmful that is. She attempted to retain the phone in principle, so she could listen to audible while reading an e-reader, and I said, no, we can look into alternative options, but let’s start a routine where you get in bed with the e-reader and audible on the phone at 10 and shut it all down by midnight. We’ll see how that goes. She actually arrived at the school parking lot with 3 minutes to spare.
I do not want to live in a world in which A. only arrives on time places because of the bump in adrenaline from me yelling at her. I hate that. I like calm.
On the furniture front, my sister may go try the chairs out on Tuesday, and the B.’s are starting to think about their furniture needs. Fingers crossed we get some additional input. R. and I are both leaning towards using the Aimee dining arm chair for our space.
As is pretty typical of my frustration / autism driven meltdowns, I don’t stop engaging in problem solving. I accelerate. So new plan is: no phone after midnight. I think that staring at the screen results in her staying up really late, especially if she is not sleep deprived. Saturday she slept past noon, catching up on the week’s sleep debt (necessary!) but then she didn’t go to sleep until 3:30 or later on Sunday morning. By Monday, she was probably slightly short but not much — but effectively 2+ hours jetlagged. Really stupid shit. I’ve asked her to read some of the science on the phone light / circadian rhythm / inconsistent waking and going to bed times etc. and how harmful that is. She attempted to retain the phone in principle, so she could listen to audible while reading an e-reader, and I said, no, we can look into alternative options, but let’s start a routine where you get in bed with the e-reader and audible on the phone at 10 and shut it all down by midnight. We’ll see how that goes. She actually arrived at the school parking lot with 3 minutes to spare.
I do not want to live in a world in which A. only arrives on time places because of the bump in adrenaline from me yelling at her. I hate that. I like calm.
On the furniture front, my sister may go try the chairs out on Tuesday, and the B.’s are starting to think about their furniture needs. Fingers crossed we get some additional input. R. and I are both leaning towards using the Aimee dining arm chair for our space.