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Regrets
This will have a lot of links.
Many people quit jobs over the last little while. Bloomberg had an article:
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2022-07-12/millions-of-americans-regret-quitting-in-the-great-resignation
Headline is accurate, but slightly misleading. Turns out that 20 million quit, a quarter are wondering if it was a good idea, and 42% are disappointed with where they landed. Basically, resigning gets a C, which for any popular decision, is probably what one would expect / hope for. If a popular decision turns out disastrous across the board, that’s really bad!
I got to thinking about other decisions people make, and realized, I have no idea how many people regret basic life choices!
Having kids: 8-15%, but we used to think it was lower, and studies are new and scarce and the rates are rising as the study quality improves. That is a hell of a thing, let me tell you.
Obviously, the divorce rate gives a crude indicator of regret, however, when a marriage produces children, a bunch of people who are happy to be divorced don’t regret the marriage because they are happy to have the kids. (Don’t start with the “or at least that’s what they are saying”. _All_ of this is that’s what they are saying.) And a bunch of people (maybe a third) who are married and not contemplating a divorce say they wouldn’t do it again if they had it to do over, which is another angle on the question.
Then, of course, what about the divorce. People regret getting divorced! Maybe a quarter of women who divorce say they regret it, but closer to 40% for men.
I’m not sure what any of this says about having kids, or switching jobs. What my main takeaway here is, wow, transitioning is really one of those low-regret things. 3% regret is _really really low_, compared to all of these numbers. Post GAS regret is even lower: less than 1%
https://journals.lww.com/prsgo/fulltext/2021/03000/regret_after_gender_affirmation_surgery__a.22.aspx
Also:
https://www.ucsf.edu/news/2020/01/416421/five-years-after-abortion-nearly-all-women-say-it-was-right-decision-study
Over 95% did _not_ regret getting an abortion. Again, _really really really_ low regret numbers.
What about vasectomies?
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/vasectomy-reversal-5-facts-men-need-to-know-2/
Between 6 and 10% of vasectomies are reversed according to this. And some additional number of men opt for sperm retrieval instead.
It is _really hard_ to find plausible information about regret having tubal / salpingectomy surgery. Quite a lot of the regret numbers date from a long time ago/involve women who were pressured to have sterilization surgery. Studies which focus on women who intentionally got one of these surgeries _and not for health reasons_ pretty much don’t exist, because the older information is being used to refuse to do these surgeries. To the extent that information exists, it looks like child-free persons 30 and under when getting the surgery have regret rates below 5%. But this is a unicorn situation; most young women who are able to access sterilization are doing it to reduce genetic breast cancer risk by having a lot of things removed.
Concern about regret should not even enter the mind of anyone contemplating an abortion or transitioning. But wow, you really, really, really should contemplate regret if you are considering getting married, divorced, or having a baby.
Switching a job, meh, they all suck anyway, apparently, if 42% weren’t happy where they landed.
Many people quit jobs over the last little while. Bloomberg had an article:
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2022-07-12/millions-of-americans-regret-quitting-in-the-great-resignation
Headline is accurate, but slightly misleading. Turns out that 20 million quit, a quarter are wondering if it was a good idea, and 42% are disappointed with where they landed. Basically, resigning gets a C, which for any popular decision, is probably what one would expect / hope for. If a popular decision turns out disastrous across the board, that’s really bad!
I got to thinking about other decisions people make, and realized, I have no idea how many people regret basic life choices!
Having kids: 8-15%, but we used to think it was lower, and studies are new and scarce and the rates are rising as the study quality improves. That is a hell of a thing, let me tell you.
Obviously, the divorce rate gives a crude indicator of regret, however, when a marriage produces children, a bunch of people who are happy to be divorced don’t regret the marriage because they are happy to have the kids. (Don’t start with the “or at least that’s what they are saying”. _All_ of this is that’s what they are saying.) And a bunch of people (maybe a third) who are married and not contemplating a divorce say they wouldn’t do it again if they had it to do over, which is another angle on the question.
Then, of course, what about the divorce. People regret getting divorced! Maybe a quarter of women who divorce say they regret it, but closer to 40% for men.
I’m not sure what any of this says about having kids, or switching jobs. What my main takeaway here is, wow, transitioning is really one of those low-regret things. 3% regret is _really really low_, compared to all of these numbers. Post GAS regret is even lower: less than 1%
https://journals.lww.com/prsgo/fulltext/2021/03000/regret_after_gender_affirmation_surgery__a.22.aspx
Also:
https://www.ucsf.edu/news/2020/01/416421/five-years-after-abortion-nearly-all-women-say-it-was-right-decision-study
Over 95% did _not_ regret getting an abortion. Again, _really really really_ low regret numbers.
What about vasectomies?
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/vasectomy-reversal-5-facts-men-need-to-know-2/
Between 6 and 10% of vasectomies are reversed according to this. And some additional number of men opt for sperm retrieval instead.
It is _really hard_ to find plausible information about regret having tubal / salpingectomy surgery. Quite a lot of the regret numbers date from a long time ago/involve women who were pressured to have sterilization surgery. Studies which focus on women who intentionally got one of these surgeries _and not for health reasons_ pretty much don’t exist, because the older information is being used to refuse to do these surgeries. To the extent that information exists, it looks like child-free persons 30 and under when getting the surgery have regret rates below 5%. But this is a unicorn situation; most young women who are able to access sterilization are doing it to reduce genetic breast cancer risk by having a lot of things removed.
Concern about regret should not even enter the mind of anyone contemplating an abortion or transitioning. But wow, you really, really, really should contemplate regret if you are considering getting married, divorced, or having a baby.
Switching a job, meh, they all suck anyway, apparently, if 42% weren’t happy where they landed.
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